This won’t be news to most people reading this blog, but being a mama is really hard. Sure, it’s rewarding. But let’s be honest – it’s hard, too. Sometimes it’s exhausting physically, and many times there’s an emotional “heaviness” that comes with the territory.
I didn’t feel the difficult emotional side as much until my kids started getting a little older. School is pretty difficult for one of my boys, and I’ve cried countless tears and prayed many prayers on his behalf. I’ve diligently worked to be patient with him during homework time in the afternoons. I’ve worked hard to remember to praise him in the areas where he excels. When his heart hurts because he feels insecure or frustrated, mine does, too.
One of my boys is struggling a little bit to find his new place in our family since his little brother has come home. He’s not the baby anymore, and I’ve tried so hard this week to love on him a little extra and remind him how special he is to me. He’s needed some extra attention, and I miss his carefree, happy-go-lucky ways. I love him so much and just want him to feel secure and super special because he IS.
The way Yohannes came to us through adoption naturally brings its own set of heartache and struggle. I’ve heard it said that adoption is a like a hug and a punch, and I definitely agree. There are many hugs in our days – literally and figuratively, but there are also punches. I won’t discuss them here specifically right now out of respect for our little boy and his story, but they mainly involve loss. He’s beginning to tell us bits and pieces about his life in Ethiopia, and while I’m so thankful that he feels comfortable sharing those things with us, my heart also grieves for him – for the loss he’s endured at such an early age.
With the joy of parenting also comes great responsibility, and sometimes that responsibility feels “heavier” than other times. Right now I’m just trying to adjust to having three kids, being a “stay-at-home” mom again, and trying to serve my family faithfully even when I want to go hide in my closet or just go sit at a coffee shop for hours alone. I’m not able to be involved in some things that I was part of a few months ago, and I’m having to realize/remember that my main ministry is to my family right now – and that’s okay.
My friend, Tabitha, sent me THIS ARTICLE recently, and I was encouraged by it. I know there are lots of other mamas who read this blog, so I hope you’ll be encouraged, too. Hang in there, and be reminded that what we’re doing . . . being mamas . . . is SO worth the investment. One of my favorite quotes is by Bonnie Jensen: “The greatest impression a mother can leave on her children is the message of her living faith, unwavering hope, and steady trust in God that will be engraved on their hearts forever.” Thanks for reading, and I hope you all have a great week!